June 12, 2009

Trippin' to Costco

Admittedly, we are not the typical Costco family. We have just two kids, and we don't buy stuff in that kind of bulk (except burritos and toilet paper, in that order). Plus, Lessley is such an amazing coupon and clearance shopper, we end up saving much more shopping elsewhere.

That said, I love going to Costco, even though I hate shopping. Most of it has to do with eating at their food court, but for some reason I really enjoy a good trip there, especially on Saturdays. Lessley, however, doesn't like eating at the food court there (what's wrong with her?), so when she's out of town (all this week at girl's camp) I take the kids to Costco for an outing!

So Wednesday when I asked Eli where he wanted to eat, and he said "Costco," I was happy to oblige. As we were heading there, I laughed to myself that my kids see Costco as "a place to eat" rather than a place to buy pickles in 5 gallon jars.

Something you have to know at this point is that our Costco Membership is expired. We don't buy enough stuff there to justify renewing it, but that hasn't stopped us from going. You simply show the old lady (who is dressed like she's trying to be a 16 year-old) your card and waltz in. Since you don't have to show your card at the food counter, you're golden!

In fact, before we had a membership to Costco (2001-2006) I would simply tell the lady at the gate that I wanted to find out about memberships, grab a brochure at the counter, then follow my nose to the polish dogs.

Or, I'd simply slip in through the "out" door while the lady with the pink highlighter was mulling over a 3 foot long recipt handed to her by a lady whose three carts were filled to the brim with the items that were free samples that day.

You have to understand at this point that my love for Costco food is founded in these foods, in this order: Polish Dog (and drink: $1.49), Hot Dog (and drink: $1.49), Churro, Chicken Bake, everything else, then Pizza.

I just don't understand Costco Pizza. The kids and Lessley get it a lot, and I have to admit, it almost always fools me. But in the end, it's ALWAYS disgusting!

If a pizza with a tasteless sauce and insufficient cheese somehow mated with the box it's served in, the resulting offspring is what Costco pizza tastes like.

So while the polish dog, with its moistly shining surface layer of grease and supple bun is absolutely divine, the over-cooked yet somehow still soggy pizza is the pits.

Am I the only one that thinks that? People eat it all the time, and some even buy a whole pizza and take it home! I had no idea so many people lacked any taste (capris on guys aside).

Anyway, after we ate, we wandered around the store checking out the electronics while the kids enjoyed a rare berry smoothie treat (which tastes like the berries were washed in an industrial-grade soap that didn't all come off).

In the end, we headed home full and fulfilled. But still missing Mom!


rain said...

K. I'm a Sam's girl, all the way. And that's basically because it's closer to where I live. The pizza at Sam's is FABULOUS. I'm not overly sure about Costco, because it's been a long time since I've partaken.
But, Costco hot dogs, like the Sam's hot dogs, will give you burps that will remind you and anyone else in the vicinity what you had for lunch. I can't handle the ten minutes of hot dog taste while scarfing one down, let alone the reminder for the rest of the day. (And surprisingly enough, Yes. I have tried the method of eliminating said smell/taste with brushing of teeth and various rinses).
Also, I have tricked myself that my family IS in need of buying things in bulk...just cause it makes me happy to know that I not only have an item we need, but we have like, 300 of them. I'm all about the excess. I realize that's something I shouldn't advertise--but I'm well aware of my shortcomings. :)

carrie said...

Ryan, I love your posts. I, honestly, think you and I could easily have been best friends in another life. :o) We have ALL the same food tastes, and I think you're hilarious. Jason makes SO much fun of me for loving the polish dogs at Costco...and being on a diet lately and NOT being able to eat one has been SO hard on me. :o) I love the way they wrap mine inside out...to seperate it from my kids' boring hot dogs. ha ha Anyway, I love eating there, too...and so do my kids. I get irritated w/Jason sometimes and often tell him he's "no fun" 'cause he doesn't quite get my infatuation w/their food. My kids love the pizza...but my kids love ANY pizza, I'm convinced. They do hate 5 buck pizza though...does that even count?? I thought of you the other day when I went through the drive up at Carl's Jr and ate a spicy chicken sandwich on my last "free day". :o) Oh well...all this food talk is making me hungry. I hope Lessley had a great time at camp. I'm sure you guys missed her so much. I feel like I haven't seen her in forever...and I'm really hoping we can get together soon. Maybe I'll suggest a Costco luncheon to her?? ha ha BTW, I totally agree w/you about the stuff at the grocery store, in general, being cheaper than Costco. (even without coupons!!) There are some exceptions...and I, of course, go to Costco to stock up on those fun things and lots of other stuff we really don't need but end up leaving with. I'm addicted to those rotisserie chickens and I usually buy about 4 or 5 at a time. (another thing my husband thinks is WEIRD..ha ha) K....I'll quit writing this obnoxiously long comment now. :o)

Tara said...

FYI-you do not need a membership to eat at the Food Court. You DO go in the out door and do not have to show a card and eat away!
But I DO hate the pizza also. I love NY style, thin crust yumminess. Costco's is just nasty

R. Teeples said...

Rainey: Amen on the burp thing. We used to go at work sometimes, and we had to keep our office doors shut for the sake of everyone else.

Carrie: I love the rotisserie chickens too. Good stuff!

Tiffany said...

I love you post. It made me laugh. And I hope you won't hold it against me but I like the pizza, I've never had much taste.lol. Am I still allowed in you sunday school class?

Sierra said...

Every time I go in Costco I feel the guilty pleasure that excess brings while at the same time cursing the American overindulgence that has made us morally bankrupt. I'm conflicted. It's a confusing place. And I don't know. I think the chicken bake is perhaps more disgusting than the pizza. I'd rather cook my own food anyway.